


Ten Tales from the Beginning.

by demonsonthemoon



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Bullying, Character Study, Coming of Age, Family Issues, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-05
Updated: 2015-11-05
Packaged: 2018-04-30 05:18:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5151746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonsonthemoon/pseuds/demonsonthemoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“In silence, he considers the fact that, if he had been born a wasp, he would already be dead.” - 10 snapshots from the childhood of Newton Geiszler, PhD.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ten Tales from the Beginning.

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to lycanandproud on tumblr because she’s soon gonna have to deal with me crying about OT3 feels in her askbox. She deserves some appreciation.  
> Written for Newtvember on tumblr.

One.

 

He's in Berlin and he's six years old and the buildings around him feel too tall. His fingers are hot and tiny in Uncle Illia's large hand, and the man keeps telling Newton that everything is going to be great. Summer has just started and everything is going to be great.  
Newton doesn't listen to him because he has made himself a promise and that promise was not to listen to stupid things. And so he doesn't say a word and keeps walking in a city that is too hot and feels too big, until his eyes catch on the flying body of a wasp. He stares at it as a man flips the insect away from his face, and keeps staring at empty air when it flies away where Newton's gaze can't follow. In silence, he considers the fact that, if he had been born a wasp, he would already be dead.

« Do you want some ice-cream before we head home ? » Illia asks, stopping in front of a mall and effectively shaking Newton out of his contemplation of time. Ice-cream is not a stupid thing. He nods vigorously and steps into the building, letting his eyes roam and take in the clothes, the furniture, the food and most of all the _people_. His uncle leads him further into the building, still holding his tiny hand, and together they climb a few flights of stairs up to a terrace that seems to preside over the whole building.

Newton asks for a pistaccio cone and all but runs towards the door that leads to the outdoor portion of the terrace. He looks down at the parc under him. There are dozens of tiny people milling about their business right beneath his feet and Newton Geiszler feels like it is _right_ because maybe there's another way, maybe he doesn't have to be a wasp and die to reach that higher thing he finds himself inevitably drawn to.

 

Two.

 

He swims in the ocean for the first time when he is seven years old. His parents take him to a Greek island for the holidays and warn him to stay near the shore while they take some time to sunbathe. Already, Newton has stopped listening to them. He isn't listening to anything other than the low grumbling of the waves as they glide around his ankles. The water is clear, and he can make out shells and pebbles lying in the sand. Newton takes a step forward, then another one. He can no longer hear anything other than his hearbeat and the rythmic pounding of the waves, desperately wishes the two could align so that he would make one with the ocean. His parents have warned him about the salt of the water, have told him that he shouldn't drink it and should close his eyes if he puts his head under. Newton thinks they are crazy. How could you close your eyes when there is so much to _see_?

The waves reach his shoulders now, so he only has to bend slightly as a new wave approaches to be completely underwater. Newton keeps his eyes wide open despite the burning sensation it causes, and he looks.

After a few seconds he has to come back out again to breathe, but he immediately dives back into the sea. A tiny fish brushes against his leg before swimming past him, and the little boy watches it go, fascinated by the fluidity of its movement.

He has to fight back tears all the way home to the hotel, and the taste of salt sticks to the inside of his mouth. His father tells him that his behaviour was dangerous, that he was scared for him. His mother says nothing, but frowns every time she crosses gaze with Newton's reddened eyes.

The young boy stares at himself in the bathroom mirror. When he closes his eyes, he can still see the colors that shined through the water.

 

Three.

 

At eight years old, Newton is pulled out of his primary school because his teachers cannot seem to stop complaining about his behaviour. Newton's mother decides that they can afford to pay for a private tutor, and the boy starts his days of homeschooling.

His teacher is a young woman with auburn hair who smiles at him and introduces herself as « Isabelle, but you can call me Iza ». She speaks with an accent, and explains that she comes from France and migrated to Germany four years ago.

Iza doesn't call him stupid when he can't focus, and she lets him ask as many questions as he wants. Newton learns about digestion in animals, and when he talks about it at dinner his parents are disgusted. He doesn't understand why. The food they are currently eating is being processed by their body at this exact moment. It's not gross. It's wonderful. It's what keeps them alive.

Newton doesn't talk about his dinner with Iza, but he asks her whether he could find a book on the human body at the library the next day. She smiles and tells him that they'll go looking together once he finishes his grammar exercises. Newton sees thousands of possibilities in the woman's smile.

 

Four.

 

His first pair of glasses has a blue frame decorated with bolts of lighting. It suits Newton's nine year old self rather well, but his mother still leaves.

 

(He breaks his glasses three months later by jumping off a wall.)

 

Five.

 

He starts secondary school at ten years old and immediately skips a grade. People seem to be confused by his presence, but at first they respect it. Then they don't.

His uncle Illia buys him an acoustic guitar and teaches him a few chords, and when Newton is sick of being so young, sick of being so smart, sick of being so different than everyone else, he plays until the tips of his fingers become red. Sometimes he keeps playing even then.

At one point Newton stops being quiet, he stops trying to fit into the background and he _lashes out_. The teachers aren't quick enough to stop him, and he lands a punch to another boy's face before both of them tumble to the ground. Newton is smaller, younger and he has never fought before. But as he turns his nails into claws to scratch as skin, as he feels his muscles tense and his bones grind together under the kicks of his classmates before someone manages to separate them all, Newton Geiszler feels alive.

He comes back home with a bruised shoulder and a bloody nose, and his father hasn't seen him smile so brightly in weeks.

The change is gradual from then on. He stops participating in class, listens with only half an ear and focuses instead on the books open in his lap. But, after the fight, his name is on everyone's lips anyway. People are wondering _who he is,_ behind the glasses and the good grades. Newton decides he wants to be a legend.

 

Six.

 

He's eleven years old and people know that he will fight back. That means people laugh at his jokes know. Highschool is weird.

Newton makes a few friends for once, invites them home and pretends not to be offended at the way they laugh at his collection of action figures carefully balanced over scientific books.

They play video games together and eat biscuits all afternoon and, yes, Newton supposes that's what friends are for.

 

Seven.

 

When he's twelve, a girl asks him to play music for her. He isn't sure whether she talks to him out of morbid curiosity or genuine interest, but the both of them meet up after school one day, and Newton brings his guitar with him. He goes through the few songs he can actually play well, and her smile is like a thousand stars. She asks him about school. About how he knows so many things and why he is so young. Newton doesn't feel mocked when she does, so he answers with all the innocence he still has access to, tells her about all the things in the world that seem so interesting to him and how he knows that if he works hard enough he could one day understand them _all_.

The girl looks impressed, even a little scared when he starts making enthusiastic gestures as he explains how his uncle helped him tear apart an old wireless radio before putting it back together again. She laughs as he finishes his story, a messy, hiccup-y sound that leaves him with reddened cheeks. She kisses him on one temple as they say goodbye.

He's excited to see her again in school the next day, but when he comes to class she's sitting with her friends and will not meet his eyes.  
Newton feels a weird emptiness settle in his stomach. He puts a hand on his belly, half expecting an alien creature to come out of it and bite off his hand. Nothing happens.

He laughs way too loudly that day. He comes home and drops his old wireless set from the window, watches it shatter to pieces. His father asks him why, but is too tired to point out that Newton is lying when he says it was an accident, and that is that.

  
  
Eight.

 

His parents agree for once. They tell him together that thirteen is way too young to go to university.

Looking at the grainy picture of his mother on Skype, Newton wishes he could tell her that nine is way too young to be left alone.

He keeps explaining that he only has to take one test that proves he has achieved a highschool level of education before he can apply. He keeps telling them that he knows he's ready for this test.

« But you only have one more year to finish highschool the normal way ! » his mother says, missing the point. He doesn't want to stay there anymore. And how can you finish highschool the normal way when you're fourteen anyway ?

He wants to scream, to lash out and _do_ something, but knows it would only make things worse. So he balls his hands into tight fists and pushes his nails into his own skin.

He wonders if it's possible to still love your parents once you get better than them.

 

Nine.

 

Fourteen years old. Second youngest student accepted at MIT. Newton moves to the US with his uncle and learns that he can be anything. He puts on a collared shirt, leaves the first two buttons open and introduces himself as « Newton, call me Newt ». It all feels a bit like running away. When people ask him why he's so young, he tells them he's a genius and leaves it at that. They accept it, somehow.

_You're doing great there, champ._

_Fake it 'til you make it._

The classes aren't a problem. They mostly rely on self-study, and Newt's used to that. He chooses to major in biology and is glad that at least the material is interesting. He sits at the back of the auditorium the few times he actually attends lectures, and when someone jokingly asks where his parents are he says he doesn't know, because contrary to some he doesn't need a kiss from mama before he falls asleep.

The attitude sticks to him like a second skin. Like the tattoos he knows he wants but is too young to get. And when he can't get by with attitude only, he retreats into science, into the world of knowledge and wonder he has carved for himself.

When the results of his first batch of exams come in and all his grades but one are above 95%, his uncle is the one celebrating with him.

« I remember the first time you asked me how a mic works. Soon enough I'll be the one asking questions in this house. »

It makes Newt a little sad. It feels too much like losing something.

 

Ten.

 

His grades are high enough that teachers agree to let him take double the usual credits, which means he is sixeen by the time he finishes his bachelor's degree. He slowly finds his place, or at least one place, in the environment surrounding him. Both he and others get more mature, and are able to see past his age, past the anomaly that he represents. He starts hanging out more and more with a group of pseudo-hipsters who think they can change the world. They don't laugh at him about the fact that he doesn't drink, but get him hooked on coffee instead.  
  
At one point he tells them that sometimes working feels like flying. One of his friends laughs at that, and next time they see each other, he offers Newt a joint. They smoke it together in the boy's dorm room. Newt coughs as he inhales the smoke for the first time, but still enjoys the burning sensation in his lungs. He feels like he could take down the world, and laughter falls easily from his lips.

 

Zero.

 

A monster is tearing through San Francisco and Newt can't help but smile. He waits for the footage to stop and for a joyful voice to announce that this was just some kind of publicity stunt. But when the pictures keep going, when he keeps on hearing the alien roars above the sound of military airplanes crashing to their deaths, his smile shatters to pieces and he wants to scream.

This is something that happens in movies. This is something that you read about in mangas. This is something that _can't_ _be happening right now._

At the back of his mind, there is something that feels _pleased_. Finally, there's something in the world that he can't understand. Finally there's a problem that he won't solve too quickly. Finally there is something that is complicated enough to keep up with him, and Newt feels drawn to that in ways he can't explain.

He runs to the toilets and empties his stomach, body trembling as it revolts against everything he is thinking. He comes back to the television, and the screen is announcing that all other programms have been cancelled for the time being so that people can follow a live-stream of the attack. Cameras are filming from afar as the assaults on the creature get more and more desperate. The bottom of the screen is displaying emergency measures for any people living in the area.

Newt puts his feet up on the couch and hugs them close to his chest. He bites his lips as he watches the creature destroy everything in its path. He can't keep his eyes off the screen, barely eats or drink for all of the next day and certainly doesn't sleep.

There is something beautiful about how alien this monster is, about how its proportions fall outside the realm of human perception. Newt looks at it for hours, creating thousands of theories about how this monster _works_. How do its bones support such a massive body ? How are its muscles arranged ? What is its purpose ? Where does it come from ? How does it _survive_? How can it survive this environment that is not its own, this environment that is fighting back agains it with all it has ?

At some point he picks up his tablet and follows various online threads where people are already sharing their ideas. He always keeps an eye focused on the screen, though.

When Trespasser is finally taken down, Newt shouts in relief and drops his tablet to the ground. He smiles at the screen and waits for his breathing to calm down.

He can't wait to start working on this.


End file.
